R.I.P

May you rest in peace.

Sri Sankaran.

Hope those bastards who violently attacked these guys get what they deserve.

And She's back

Can't Blame Me for Wanting to Change

Just for the respect I've lost

What I valued the most

For everything that I've done

I don't regret a single one

Everything happens for a reason

For a purpose I can't find alone

There's always a lesson to learn

There are always ones concerned

I know I'm not going though this alone and it's stupid for me to have ever thought that way. I know my problems are my own and I want everything to go my way.

I have to thank God for giving me the parents who always bring me back. No matter how much I've crossed that line, they're always there for me. Yea, I do understand why I feel down these days. I guess I have to pray for strength. The strength to love God more than anything else.

And yeah, I'm just another human being. I must never feel like I'm better than anyone else. Even if I know that I'm right, if it's not important, just keep it all to myself. People HATE being proven wrong. So do I, but I'm learning to accept my mistakes. I wanna be able to do that.

All good. I don't need the approval from other people. I don't need their judgements. All I need to know is if I'm doing the right thing. All I need to know is if I'll be able to keep on changing for the better. If I'll be able to be more grateful for whatever has been given to me, coz in the end, they're not even mine.

Who could say no to luxury and all that expensive crap. Hey, if it's given to me, then I'll accept it. If I don't have it and I really want it, then I'll have to work for it. I don't wanna get used to a lifestyle that will drag me down in the future when I have to live on my own salary and then I realize that it's not enough. I wanna be able to start from the bottom. I wanna be able to shake off the arrogance. I wanna be able to appreciate other people more.

That's all. Sappy? indeed. Haha

Looking Back at It

How Could I have called myself emo???

Naw, no offense to all those people out there who call themselves emo. I just don't believe in labels. Labels are for posers. It's a lifestyle choice.

I'm just uwie g. Just one of them college girls who are trying to get through crap that is NOTHING compared to crap many other people go through. Therefore, I've stopped feeling sorry for myself and just take what is given and work hard for the better. I believe no matter what religion you are, no matter who you are, if you work hard for it, with good intention and no arrogance, then you'll get what you want. For some, not directly. Some of us have to face the obstacles. The obstacles that are there to remind us that we're no higher or lower than anyone else. We're in no position whatsoever to judge other people and tell them off.

I guess I've been hating too much these dais. Been bitching too much. I realize it's just one of them ways to make myself feel better. To make myself feel like I'm not the worst of all people. Well, I'm just one of them people who makes mistakes and instead of taking them out on other people, I just gotta evaluate myself. Fix it myself.

I still have people who give a shit around me. Some of them actually do give a damn and expect no return. Some of them are just backstabbers. Some of them are confused with their intentions. Yeah, I've also learnt this: Don't expect shit from anybody. Expect the good from life, but not from people. Yes, I believe there's good in everyone, but for them to care about you for no return... I'm still working on that.

I may seem like I spit out sunshines, rainbow and butterflies. Creepy, but you know what I mean. I don't. So sometimes I can't hide my feelings, I'm sorry. If you're tired of looking at my frowning, then look away.

I also have to stop complaining. Blah. O well. I have reports to do. I have tests to do. Wish me luck whoever you are.

Too Much for a Week

Thank God.

Naw, just too much happening in a week.

Prayers to those who got attacked, hope they get better soon. mentally and physically.

Anyway..

Bah, I remember my hobbies. I used to decorate my room like crazy. Back in AD. Back in Indo. Even my Saudi room. I don't stay there for a whole year, but loving it indeed.